“There's no way around grief and loss: you can dodge all you want, but sooner or later you just have to go into it, through it, and, hopefully, come out the other side. The world you find there will never be the same as the world you left.” ― Johnny Cash

I have used the above Johnny Cash quote before as a title of my blog but I thought it fitting to use it again today for a couple reasons. My coworker and my friend Noel Williams who was a big Johnny Cash fan died unexpectedly this week. All of us in the Security department are devastated.

Noel was the anchor of the department. If ever there was a call that I needed or wanted help with I was always happy when I knew that Noel was by my side. He knew his job and was great at it. He kept us all in line and made sure we did our jobs like we should. He was not only valued in our department but by the students, staff and faculty. You knew when he was on duty that everything would be alright.

I have worked with Noel for 17 years. I can count on one had the number of times I saw him outside of work yet I think of him as the brother I never had. We spent hours and hours together at work and that adds up to a lot of downtime with nothing to do but talk. We talked about everything from world issues to ours dogs. When I was going though my divorce and I was a huge mess Noel was always there for me to talk to. He was a safe person to talk to and I knew he would not judge me or betray my trust. Like all people we would get mad at each other over some little thing  but we alway got over it. Once you were a friend of Noels you stayed his friend.

Noel loved to hunt and fish so he was always full of stories about his latest adventure. Just last week he was out turkey hunting when he had a coyote come by and he managed to call it in and it ran right to his turkey decoy knocking it over. Noel shot at it and missed and then managed to get another shot off and got it.

He was so proud of that coyote kill.  We laughed about his hunting stories because they would take him an hour to tell what really only needed 5 minutes. But that was Noel, he had passion about hunting and fishing and he loved to talk about it. And of course I made him look at all my family and trip pictures and I am sure he was bored to tears with them.

Just days after getting the coyote Noel got himself a nice turkey. Fall was his favorite season and he was looking forward to deer hunting in November.

Lately a lot of our talks have been about retirement and what we were going to do. Noel and I both have a love of the outdoors and both have a lot of hobbies that we know would keep us busy. We both planed on retirement within a few years of each other and were looking forward to it. I never thought I would work here without Noel. Today he was suppose to work with me. It was so hard at noon when he did not come walking in the door carrying his lunch box. The office is empty.....

Noel was a hardworking, honest and loyal friend. He loved his family more then anything they brought him great joy. He also loved his dog Jigs who was beside him when he died.

Life will go on, the world will keep moving and down the road Noels position will be filled but it will never be the same working at Carleton again.....

I am sure he is looking down at us now saying will you stop all that crying....he was fond of saying everyone dies sometime so you better enjoy life now.

So I am trying but it is hard. I will miss you my friend. I hope wherever you are the hunting and fishing is always good.  Every time I eat a peanut M & M I am going to think of you....

Sharon