"All truly great thoughts are conceived while walking" -Friedrich Nietzsche, German philosopher

I am a little late but here is my 2023 year in review in pictures ...

 It had its ups and downs, but we plowed through it and came out better for all we experienced. 

 

So here is my year in review. January started with a lot of snow! It was so pretty and fun to have snow to walk in and cross-country ski. Rick and I got to go out several times. 

We had our Becker Family Christmas in January. 

Winter Archery season started in January. Rick is teaching JOAD classes again and was so happy that Liam and Josie were both in it. 

In February we saw more snow 

Morgan had enough of snow and winter by February 

The squirrels discovered how to open the bird feeder and spent the rest of the winter cleaning it out. 

More cross-country skiing and spending time playing in the snow

Otis being Otis...

March brought my birthday and when I asked Rick to make me a cake he delivered! It was the best cake he had ever made, a Guinness, chocolate cake. 

In April we did our first-ever winter camping trip. We went to Jay Cooke State Park. We had so much fun!! 

April was a big month for us. Rick was inducted into the Minnesota Archery Hall of Fame. I am so proud of him. He was very humbled and honored to be inducted. 

Also in April, I did something that I had never done before. A friend contacted me and said she had an extra ticket for Hamilton that was being performed at the Orpheum in Minneapolis. I had been to the area many times with other people but I had never driven up by myself. I was a little nervous about it but I managed to find parking, walk to the restaurant to meet my friend and get back home without getting lost. It was such a great show. I was very happy she invited me and I said yes. 

May brought another camping trip with friends. We went to Camden State Park. We had perfect spring weather and a great time was had by all. 

May also brought family time. We celebrated Mom's 84th birthday by taking family pictures and then having a party. 

I look at this picture and it brings me such joy. Mom was so happy that day. It was a perfect day. She kept saying she could not have asked for a better day. 

We celebrated Memorial Day with a cookout with family. 

In June we managed to get two camping trips in. The first was for an archery tournament. We camped out at Crow Wing State Park for the weekend. 

For our second camping trip in June, we went to Pettibone Resort on the Mississippi River in LaCrosse, WI with all the kids and grandkids. 

In July we went to Big Bog State Park and did some fishing on Red Lake. This ended up being our last camping trip of the year. 

Otis tore his ACL in July so he was not supposed to walk on his bad leg. He enjoyed being carried around when we went on our hikes. 

After our camping trip to Red Lake, I spend the rest of July at my parent's house. We had a huge estate sale and I brought the camper van there to help with the massive undertaking. It was heartbreaking, exhausting, and joyful all at the same time. 

In August we put our house on the market and sold it in 4 days! 

I also went to the Orchestra Hall with Cassie, Amy, and Carey to see Dessa. It was great! 

The school district decided that all the Para's had to take a test to show that we were Highly Qualified. It was so stressful for me. It had things on it that I had not done since I was in high school over 40 years ago. I had to study hard. In the end, I managed to pass it. I was proud of myself. 

September Rick got a nice Northern while fishing on Clear Lake. 

We celebrated Labor Day in the 90-degree heat at a local brewery listening to a band and enjoying some pizza, beer, and root beer. 

One last time on the water for me. 

October was filled with grief.  It was so hard to say goodbye to Mom.....

On October 21 Dad turned 88 and Christa turned 37.  Every year we take their picture together. This year it was only two days after Mom had died. It was also one day after we moved Dad into Memory Care. It was so hard for him and all of us. But we got to see his smile when Christa asked to take a picture with him. 

On October 30 we finally moved into our new house. We are so happy here. 

I found that I did not take hardly any pictures in November. We were so busy unpacking and just trying to come to terms with the past few months. 

My huge Christmas Cactus survived the move and was in full bloom at the beginning of November. 

I finally hit my 2023 miles in December. It was the longest it has taken me to do it since I started doing the challenge in 2020. I walked all of my miles this year, no running for me. 

Mom gave me all her Christmas ornaments that she had when she first got married. I had them all on my Christmas tree. I was home with COVID feeling sorry for myself when I noticed one of the ornaments was moving. I thought it was odd because nothing else was moving. This ornament moved back and forth for hours. And then suddenly another of her ornaments started to move. It also kept moving for about an hour. I think Mom was stopping by to let me know everything was going to be okay and to tell me Merry Christmas. 

I have a video of it moving but I can't get it to upload. 

If you made it to the end of this long post congratulations... I tried to concentrate on all the good that we had in 2023.  We had so much joy mixed in with the sadness. Camping, family time, fishing, wearing all of mom's clothes and jewelry, moving into our new house, fishing being with friends, and reconnecting with people and lots and lots of hugs. 

One of the things that really brought me joy this year was the big group text we started with my sisters, kids, spouses, nieces, and nephews. We started it when we had the big estate sale for my parents as a way to communicate with each other while the sale was going on. When it was all done we just kept it going. Now every week or so someone will put a text out there. I love getting a random text from someone in the group. I think we all became so much closer this past year. 

So what I learned this year is that even in great sadness we can find joy. 

Go find some joy...

Sharon 

"Memory is a way of holding on to the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose." —The Wonder Years

 

I have had so many emotions over the past couple of months. Some things have brought me so much sorrow and others have brought me so much joy. I have been all over the place emotionally. 

It has been seven weeks since I said goodbye to my mom. It has been one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. Being with her in the weeks before she died was awful because I knew it was the end but it also brought me such joy knowing that I was able to help take care of her like she had taken care of me my whole life. It has been so hard not having her here. I find myself thinking all the time that I need to call Mom and tell her something and then I remember that she has died. It breaks my heart every time.

 Before she died she let me take her Christmas ornaments she had when she married 64 years ago. I was so happy to have them. Some of them are chipped and missing paint but I love them. all. They are all on my Christmas tree alongside the ornaments that were my Grandma Trenda's and ones from my mother-in-law. As I was putting them on the tree I was telling Rick how much they meant to me and of course, I started to cry. Christmas without my Mom is hard....

So now onto some joyous things! 

Those of you who know me know that I am always looking at real estate. I love looking at what's out there and what houses are going for. So this summer I found a house that was 2 miles out of town with an acre of land. I showed it to Rick and we both liked it. But we both thought it was priced too high. Well, I kept an eye on it and after being on the market for a month the price came down.  So in the first week of August, we went to look at the house. We both knew immediately we would be happy in the house. It needed some work but nothing we could not handle. So, we put in an offer and got the house! We put our house on the market and 4 days later it was sold for over our asking price. 

All was going good and I had the house packed and ready to move at the end of September. And then the worst happened. The person that was buying our house financing fell though! I was so upset. We were going to have to put our house back on the market. But a miracle happened. The person managed to figure out his financing and the deal was back on. We were delayed a month on closing but it was going to happen. 

So we were all set to close on October 27. But Mom died on the 19th of October. The funeral was set for October 26. I called my realtor and asked if we could change the closing again and thank goodness everyone agreed. So three days after the funeral, we moved. To say I was a little overwhelmed is an understatement. But we did it. 

We are so happy here! It is so nice to be out in the country again. I did not realize how much I missed it. We have room for the boat and camper van here. The dogs love having more room to run. And the most exciting thing of all is the fact that I now have a willow tree!!! My whole life I have been obsessed with willow trees. My Grandma Becker had a huge willow tree in her yard and I always remember loving it and playing under it. So when I saw the willow tree in the yard I knew I had to move here. 

Two days after moving I went back to work. I had been off work for almost a month so I could help take care of Mom and help with Dad. It was hard to go back but also so good to be back. I missed my students and I missed the routine of just everyday life. It was good to be back. The students were as happy to see me as I was to see them that first day back. They bring me so much joy. 

On December 3, I finally hit my goal of 2023 miles in the year 2023. I was so far behind this year but considering I did not do anything for almost two months I am happy that I finished. Goal achieved!!!

We got Chinese food the other day and when I opened my fortune cookie this was my fortune. It was totally meant for me because we are so happy in our small house!! 

My Dad is doing okay in the Memory Care unit at Mill City. We moved him out of the assisted living apartment that he was living in with Mom the day after she died. It was so hard to do, but with his Alzheimer's he needs 24-hour care.  He was so confused at first and kept forgetting that Mom had died and that he had gone to the funeral.  But now that it has been a while he is settling in. Most days he remembers that Mom has died and where he is. He told me when I was there this week that he likes it there and he likes all the people who help take care of him.  He also told me that getting old is okay but losing your memory is hard. He said that he would be sitting there thinking and wondering why Charlotte had not come to visit him and then he remembered that she died. It broke my heart to hear him say that. It is so hard because he knows he is memory is going and there is nothing he can do to make it come back. Alzheimer's sucks. 

Since we are still getting things put away and going through some boxes I came across a photo book that had somehow got packed into a box of random stuff. It was from 2011 when we all went up to my sister's house for a weekend. I opened it up and the first photo was of my Mom holding her great-grandson Eli when he was just two months old. I immediately burst into tears. All I could think about was how much I missed her. 

Grief is hard but I have good people that are helping me through it....

Until next time

Sharon 

"Words are not enough to express the unconditional love that exists between a mother and a daughter." - Caitlin Houston

 

I love this picture of my Mom because she just looks so happy. 

As we spend our last moments with my Mom we have all been doing a lot of reminiscing of what she has meant to all of us. It has been so fun to hear all the stories of the good times Mom has had over the years. Every single person who has come up to visit Mom has told us what a great person she is. She is so loved by everyone. 

Mom has taught me so many things over the years and has always been here for me in anything I needed.

I have so many memories of being with Mom as she taught me to sew, cook, bake, garden, and many, many life skills. 

4-H was a huge part of Mom's life when she was a child. I remember her telling us all about the Silent Pie demonstrations she did while she was in 4-H and winning a trip to the State Fair. So when I, along with my cousin made it to the State Fair with our demonstration she was so proud of us. She was the person who taught me not to be afraid to speak in public and to share the skills I know with others. 

She was the person that taught me how to be smart with my money. I remember her going to the bank with me to open my first checking account. She sat down with me to make sure I knew how to balance it.  She was so organized when it came to bookwork and she has passed that life skill onto me. 

I am sure everyone thinks their Mom is the best cook but my Mom really is. There are so many things that she cooked that I cannot even come close to doing. But I try because she taught me to not give up. I still find myself calling her and asking her questions about recipes. The thought of not being able to do that crushes me.....

Speaking of calling her, my daughters and I were just talking about what terrible spellers we are. I told them how I used to call Mom up and ask her how to spell things. The first thing she would say to me was, did you try looking it up in the dictionary and I would respond that is what you are for. And of course, she would then tell me how to spell what I was trying to spell. The girls thought that was so funny because they just ask Google how to spell things. Mom has always been one of the smartest people I know. 

And then there is laundry...I will admit I was a spoiled child when it came to doing chores. Mom would let me get away with not doing everything I was supposed to do. So when it came to doing laundry she aways did it for me. Then when I was in the 12th grade Mom went on a dream trip to Ireland she made me learn how to do laundry. I thought I did a good job of it until recently. As Mom has been getting sicker my girls have been helping her with her laundry. They have all asked me why Grandma's clothes come out so much better than theirs. They tell me I am a failure at teaching them how to do laundry properly. Sorry Mom I guess I did not listen to you very well.....

 When I was 19 and had a baby while I really was still a child myself Mom taught me how to be a Mommy to the tiny baby that I had no idea what to do with. I am not sure I could have done it without her. She welcomed me back in her home until Cassie was 7 months old and even after we moved out she was always the person I called when I was struggling. 

My sisters and I used to go to Mom and Dad's house every Sunday with all the kids and spend the day. Mom was working a full-time job back then but every Sunday would entertain us and make us a big meal. I don't know how she did it, it must have been exhausting for her but she never complained. We had so much fun on those Sundays. The kids all loved going to Grandma's house. 

I see now how Mom was creating memories for all of us. Every one of the Grandkids and Great Grandkids has so many stories and memories of spending time with her. You could always find her in the audience for every concert they were in and cheering them on at sporting events. 

So now as her life is coming to an end she is bringing us all together again. So many friends and relatives have been stopping up to say one last goodbye to her and tell her what she has meant to them. I love hearing all the stories from her lady friends of all the trips they have done together. And hearing from all of her nieces and nephews about all the things she did for them over the years is heartwarming. Watching my daughters come to see her and help care for her with such tenderness these past weeks shows me just what a great grandma she has been to them. 

She has touched so many people's lives over the last 84 years. She is the best Mom, Grandma, Sister, Aunt, wife to my Dad, and friend to everyone. 

She is the anchor that holds us all together..... 

Even though I know that no one lives forever and that Mom has had a great life I don't want her to go....This is so, so hard...But I know that we will be okay because she has taught us well....

Hugs to everyone that Mom has touched...

Sharon