"Memory is a way of holding on to the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose." —The Wonder Years

 

I have had so many emotions over the past couple of months. Some things have brought me so much sorrow and others have brought me so much joy. I have been all over the place emotionally. 

It has been seven weeks since I said goodbye to my mom. It has been one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. Being with her in the weeks before she died was awful because I knew it was the end but it also brought me such joy knowing that I was able to help take care of her like she had taken care of me my whole life. It has been so hard not having her here. I find myself thinking all the time that I need to call Mom and tell her something and then I remember that she has died. It breaks my heart every time.

 Before she died she let me take her Christmas ornaments she had when she married 64 years ago. I was so happy to have them. Some of them are chipped and missing paint but I love them. all. They are all on my Christmas tree alongside the ornaments that were my Grandma Trenda's and ones from my mother-in-law. As I was putting them on the tree I was telling Rick how much they meant to me and of course, I started to cry. Christmas without my Mom is hard....

So now onto some joyous things! 

Those of you who know me know that I am always looking at real estate. I love looking at what's out there and what houses are going for. So this summer I found a house that was 2 miles out of town with an acre of land. I showed it to Rick and we both liked it. But we both thought it was priced too high. Well, I kept an eye on it and after being on the market for a month the price came down.  So in the first week of August, we went to look at the house. We both knew immediately we would be happy in the house. It needed some work but nothing we could not handle. So, we put in an offer and got the house! We put our house on the market and 4 days later it was sold for over our asking price. 

All was going good and I had the house packed and ready to move at the end of September. And then the worst happened. The person that was buying our house financing fell though! I was so upset. We were going to have to put our house back on the market. But a miracle happened. The person managed to figure out his financing and the deal was back on. We were delayed a month on closing but it was going to happen. 

So we were all set to close on October 27. But Mom died on the 19th of October. The funeral was set for October 26. I called my realtor and asked if we could change the closing again and thank goodness everyone agreed. So three days after the funeral, we moved. To say I was a little overwhelmed is an understatement. But we did it. 

We are so happy here! It is so nice to be out in the country again. I did not realize how much I missed it. We have room for the boat and camper van here. The dogs love having more room to run. And the most exciting thing of all is the fact that I now have a willow tree!!! My whole life I have been obsessed with willow trees. My Grandma Becker had a huge willow tree in her yard and I always remember loving it and playing under it. So when I saw the willow tree in the yard I knew I had to move here. 

Two days after moving I went back to work. I had been off work for almost a month so I could help take care of Mom and help with Dad. It was hard to go back but also so good to be back. I missed my students and I missed the routine of just everyday life. It was good to be back. The students were as happy to see me as I was to see them that first day back. They bring me so much joy. 

On December 3, I finally hit my goal of 2023 miles in the year 2023. I was so far behind this year but considering I did not do anything for almost two months I am happy that I finished. Goal achieved!!!

We got Chinese food the other day and when I opened my fortune cookie this was my fortune. It was totally meant for me because we are so happy in our small house!! 

My Dad is doing okay in the Memory Care unit at Mill City. We moved him out of the assisted living apartment that he was living in with Mom the day after she died. It was so hard to do, but with his Alzheimer's he needs 24-hour care.  He was so confused at first and kept forgetting that Mom had died and that he had gone to the funeral.  But now that it has been a while he is settling in. Most days he remembers that Mom has died and where he is. He told me when I was there this week that he likes it there and he likes all the people who help take care of him.  He also told me that getting old is okay but losing your memory is hard. He said that he would be sitting there thinking and wondering why Charlotte had not come to visit him and then he remembered that she died. It broke my heart to hear him say that. It is so hard because he knows he is memory is going and there is nothing he can do to make it come back. Alzheimer's sucks. 

Since we are still getting things put away and going through some boxes I came across a photo book that had somehow got packed into a box of random stuff. It was from 2011 when we all went up to my sister's house for a weekend. I opened it up and the first photo was of my Mom holding her great-grandson Eli when he was just two months old. I immediately burst into tears. All I could think about was how much I missed her. 

Grief is hard but I have good people that are helping me through it....

Until next time

Sharon 

"Words are not enough to express the unconditional love that exists between a mother and a daughter." - Caitlin Houston

 

I love this picture of my Mom because she just looks so happy. 

As we spend our last moments with my Mom we have all been doing a lot of reminiscing of what she has meant to all of us. It has been so fun to hear all the stories of the good times Mom has had over the years. Every single person who has come up to visit Mom has told us what a great person she is. She is so loved by everyone. 

Mom has taught me so many things over the years and has always been here for me in anything I needed.

I have so many memories of being with Mom as she taught me to sew, cook, bake, garden, and many, many life skills. 

4-H was a huge part of Mom's life when she was a child. I remember her telling us all about the Silent Pie demonstrations she did while she was in 4-H and winning a trip to the State Fair. So when I, along with my cousin made it to the State Fair with our demonstration she was so proud of us. She was the person who taught me not to be afraid to speak in public and to share the skills I know with others. 

She was the person that taught me how to be smart with my money. I remember her going to the bank with me to open my first checking account. She sat down with me to make sure I knew how to balance it.  She was so organized when it came to bookwork and she has passed that life skill onto me. 

I am sure everyone thinks their Mom is the best cook but my Mom really is. There are so many things that she cooked that I cannot even come close to doing. But I try because she taught me to not give up. I still find myself calling her and asking her questions about recipes. The thought of not being able to do that crushes me.....

Speaking of calling her, my daughters and I were just talking about what terrible spellers we are. I told them how I used to call Mom up and ask her how to spell things. The first thing she would say to me was, did you try looking it up in the dictionary and I would respond that is what you are for. And of course, she would then tell me how to spell what I was trying to spell. The girls thought that was so funny because they just ask Google how to spell things. Mom has always been one of the smartest people I know. 

And then there is laundry...I will admit I was a spoiled child when it came to doing chores. Mom would let me get away with not doing everything I was supposed to do. So when it came to doing laundry she aways did it for me. Then when I was in the 12th grade Mom went on a dream trip to Ireland she made me learn how to do laundry. I thought I did a good job of it until recently. As Mom has been getting sicker my girls have been helping her with her laundry. They have all asked me why Grandma's clothes come out so much better than theirs. They tell me I am a failure at teaching them how to do laundry properly. Sorry Mom I guess I did not listen to you very well.....

 When I was 19 and had a baby while I really was still a child myself Mom taught me how to be a Mommy to the tiny baby that I had no idea what to do with. I am not sure I could have done it without her. She welcomed me back in her home until Cassie was 7 months old and even after we moved out she was always the person I called when I was struggling. 

My sisters and I used to go to Mom and Dad's house every Sunday with all the kids and spend the day. Mom was working a full-time job back then but every Sunday would entertain us and make us a big meal. I don't know how she did it, it must have been exhausting for her but she never complained. We had so much fun on those Sundays. The kids all loved going to Grandma's house. 

I see now how Mom was creating memories for all of us. Every one of the Grandkids and Great Grandkids has so many stories and memories of spending time with her. You could always find her in the audience for every concert they were in and cheering them on at sporting events. 

So now as her life is coming to an end she is bringing us all together again. So many friends and relatives have been stopping up to say one last goodbye to her and tell her what she has meant to them. I love hearing all the stories from her lady friends of all the trips they have done together. And hearing from all of her nieces and nephews about all the things she did for them over the years is heartwarming. Watching my daughters come to see her and help care for her with such tenderness these past weeks shows me just what a great grandma she has been to them. 

She has touched so many people's lives over the last 84 years. She is the best Mom, Grandma, Sister, Aunt, wife to my Dad, and friend to everyone. 

She is the anchor that holds us all together..... 

Even though I know that no one lives forever and that Mom has had a great life I don't want her to go....This is so, so hard...But I know that we will be okay because she has taught us well....

Hugs to everyone that Mom has touched...

Sharon 

"A family is a risky venture, because the greater the love, the greater the loss... That's the trade-off. But I'll take it all." - Brad Pitt

 

We are missing a few but this is a photo of us after 4 days of hard work. Dirty sweating and still smiling...

I am not even sure how to start this blog. I have so many emotions going on that I can't even function today. So forgive me if I am all over the place in this post...

As many of you know my Mom was diagnosed with terminal cancer a few months back.  Around the same time my Dad had a heart attack and had five stints put in. He was also diagnosed with the beginning of Alzheimer's. It has been a very hard year on all of us. 

My Mom and Dad made the very hard decision to move into an assisted living apartment after living in their house for 26 years. So on June 17th we all helped them pack up and move. After we got everything moved that they wanted to have we had to all decided what to do with the rest of the things they had in the house and three out buildings. After much discussion it was decided that we would have an estate sale the last weekend in July. 

Everyone in the family worked so hard to pull it off. I was told by many people to just let someone else come in and take care of it for you. But after 80 plus years of living my parents had a lot of things that needed to be sorted and gone though before we could begin getting ready to sale things. So we all took a weekend off and then it started. Everyone helped as much as they could between work and vacations. We unpacked boxes, sorted, organized and started to price things.  

On July 20th my sister Diane came from her home up north and started staying at my parents house. I took our camper van over the next day and parked it in their yard and moved in. We along with our youngest sister Linda, our spouses,  all the grandkids and great grandkids worked day and night and got it ready. In the end we had three buildings full and ready to go. Well really we were never really all done we just did everything we could. We had things priced and organized by building. We had parking roped off. We had schedules made up for workers,  and thanks to Cassie we had a social media marketing blitz. 

 I cannot express enough how much I have been overwhelmed by the people that came to help us before and during the sale. We all had friend that have never even met my parents just tell us "I can help." They gave us tables and signs to use, they came the weeks before the sale to help and the days of the sale. I will never get over the generosity of all of them taking time out of there busy schedules to come help us. 

Of course the first two days of the sale were 90 plus degrees and so, so humid. I am grateful that none of us or our costumers passed out! We were so busy the first day, we had people  parking all over the place to get in. They waited in line to check out and were so patient with us waiting to get into the buildings to shop and check out.  

I also cannot express how overwhelmed we all were with the love and kindness that was shown to all of us and to our parents. I was overjoyed to see relatives and friends that I have not seen in years. And watching all the people that have know my parents for the past 80 some years come and visit with them and talk about all the memories they have had together was so heartwarming. 

Watching the last birdhouse that my Dad had made sell made me cry, having the perfect person buy the beer can collection that all of us worked on collecting in the 70"s brought me great joy. Seeing the happiness on the faces of the wonderful women that came all the way from Minneapolis to buy the dinning room table made me so happy. When we said to them that we had a lot of memories around that table they responded with we are going to make a lot of memories around it too I was overjoyed. So many of the things we sold had so many memories attached to them for us and my parents. It was so hard to see some of it go for all of us. 

In the end the estate sale was a great success. But what sold and did not sell was not what we all took away....

It is the fact that as a family we all came together and pulled this all off. I have not spent so much time with my sisters in years. To see all of my children and nieces and nephews bond again was so fun. Every night after the sale closed we took our folding chairs out to the deck and decompressed. We laughed and we cried. I had so many people tell me during the sale how they could not believe how we were all getting along and having fun. They told me how lucky we were to have family that actually cared for each other. And I could not agree more.  

After we got the last of the things packed up to be donated and the tables and taken down and it was time to tell everyone goodbye I think we all were overcome with emotion. The love we all have for each other and the heartache that we have for what Mom and Dad are going though is overwhelming. We are all exhausted mentally and physically but its okay because that is what you do for those that you love.....

When we were trying to get a picture of all of us that were still there my Dad thought he was pretty funny...He likes to tell us he might not remember everything but he still has his sense of humor.

As the sunset as we were driving away we all had tears in our eyes from sadness, gratitude, happiness and love.....

Tell your family that you love them often....

Sharon  

“And at the end of the day, your feet should be dirty, your hair messy and your eyes sparkling.” – Shanti

 

For the first time since 2021 we were finally able to do a family camping trip where everyone came and was able to stay the whole time. Nick was in charge of picking the spot this year and he did great. We went over the border to Wisconsin and stayed at Pettibone Resort . We don't usually stay at private campgrounds but this one was great. We were right on the Mississippi river, the campsites were big and they let us put tents up on our site for the people without campers for only $10. a night. The had biking trails and a beach less than a mile away that was great. 

Nash and Larina 

The beach on the Mississippi River

 

Rick and Nick made 9 homemade pizza's for everyone on Friday night. It was so good! We were all stuffed. I never took a single picture of the pizzas so the above photo is of a pizza Rick made at home 😂

It was Eli's 12th birthday on Saturday. 

 

We lucked out on the weather. We had some rain during the day but it never lasted too long so we were able to enjoy the days. It did rain a lot overnight but we did not care because we were sleeping. 

Oliver and Nash enjoying one of my special smoothies made just for them. 

Nash wanted to go fishing so bad with Grandpa Rick! 

They were finally able to go out and Nash was the first one to catch a fish! 

Olivers catch of the day. 

Rick was so happy that he got to spend so much time fishing while we were there. He spend most of the time in the boat taking whom ever wanted to go. He had not spent very much time fishing the river before so it was a learning trip on where to go. They managed to get fish every time they went out so that is great. 

The campgrounds had a little beach that we checked out. It was not nearly as nice as the other one but the kids still managed to have fun. 

Oh Liam 😂😂😂

I always feel like I take a lot of pictures but then when I get home and look at them I realize that I did not. Jeff and CJ joined us on our trip and I did not get a single picture of them! 

I guess it is okay that I did not have my phone out all the time taking pictures and just enjoyed the time making memories with everyone....

Make memories....

Sharon 

"I travel because I’d rather look back at my life, saying ‘I can’t believe I did that’ instead of ‘if only I had' – Florine Bos

 

Last weekend we took a three day camping trip to Crow Wing State Park. We got there on Friday afternoon set up camp and then went for a hike.

I always try to look at pictures of the campsite before I book it to make sure it is pretty level and nice. Well I totally failed when it came to our site, number 42. It was so uneven and downhill! But the joys of having a camper van meant that we could park sideways in the site and we were level! Once we got parked we were actually happy with the site, it was nice and big. Also we did not bring Otis and Morgan with us on this trip!! We never camp without the dogs so it was weird to not have them. They got to spend the weekend with Christa and chase her cats around and play with her dog Coal. 

The trail was very pretty. We were on the Crow Wing river and Mississippi River. They have a really cool area on the trail that use to be the town of Crow Wing. They had a ton of information about the town. 

The mosquitoes were awful!! We had on bug spray but if you stop for more then a second they attacked!! Good thing I am a fast walker 😆

We saw this huge mushroom along the trail. I have not idea what kind it is but it looked pretty cool. 

The real reason we were in the area was so that Rick could shoot the MSAA State 900 round and the 50 meter. He got 1st place in the 900 round and 2nd place in the 50 meter. He shot great and had a lot of fun!! It is aways great to see our archery family. 

Enjoying life....

Sharon 

“Memories are stitched with love.” – Unknown

My Mom has so many talents and skills one of them is being a seamstress. As long as I can remember she has sewed for herself and for us. Most of the clothing we wore as young children were sewed by my mom. She sewed us dresses, skirts, pants, shorts, tops and pj's. She sewed the bridesmaids dresses for my sisters wedding and many costumes for me when I was in plays in high school. 

I don't remember when I started sewing but I feel like I have been doing it my whole life. My mom had so much skill sewing and she passed that skill down to me. I cannot say I am near the seamstress she is but I could never be as skilled as I am now without her guidance, patiences and love of sewing. 

As we are helping my Mom and Dad go through there things I came across my Moms sewing basket. The sewing basket is such a big part of my memories of sewing with my Mom. When she told me I could have it I was overjoyed. When I opened it up it was full of treasures. 

One of the other things we came across was a box of vintage clothing that my Mom made. My daughters were so excited!! Most of it was from the 1960's and 1970's. What was most exciting to them was that a lot of it is back in fashion now. 

We had a lot of fun trying it on and finding pieces that we can wear. 

Christa was so excited about this dress. Of course she can only take pictures with chickens in them 😊

I LOVE this dress!!! I am totally going to wear it this summer.

             Most everything fit Josie so I made her be my model. She looked so cute in everything.

She decided that the white dress looked like a wedding dress

I love these little summer shirts! My mom has a bunch of vintage patterns and I hope to find the pattern for the shirt. If not I am going to take one apart and make my own pattern. 

                                             Larina is wearing my 1st communion dress. 

Sarah is wearing another one of the dresses my mom made. She was so happy when we told her she could keep it! It fits her perfect! 

This is such a classic dress. She had a bunch of them. She said it was such an easy pattern that she would just whip one up every couple of weeks to wear when they went out to dances. 

This is a dress that either Linda or I wore. It is so, so cute!! Cassie pulled Larina out of the pool to put it on for me for the picture. She needs to be just a little taller and it will fit her perfect. 

This is my Mom, my daughters and granddaughters. Because of my Mom teaching me how to sew I was able to pass her skill on to everyone in the picture.  Josie and Larina are wearing dresses that my Mom made. Four generations of seamstresses all because of Mom....

Pass on your skills.....
Sharon 

  “The challenges are part of the reason why it is so rewarding to sew a garment and be able to say ‘I made that.”

 – Assembil Books